In a good relationship between friends it is possible that, for instance, the two friends will not see each other for quite a while. The relation can take it. Both lives can take a different turn; one has a new job, the other a new relation and for some period both have less contact. But after a while you meet again, and the friendship is as ever before.
Networking is not quite like this. Take for instance this example; two people know each other for quite some time. They have exchange links on a mutual business network -- LinkedIn or openBC -– but they haven't met lately.
But then, all of a sudden...
... someone else connected to LinkedIn, who is linked to “Eric” -- to give him a name -- requests to be introduced to the network of the other -- “John”. Eric thinks that he knows John well enough and reckons that he can forward the request (which is a normal e-mail on LinkedIn) to John, He adds a little note and clicks on “SEND.”
After a day when he doesn’t get notified, he wonders whether this action has been settled. So he enters the network site and checks the connections. No change. “Could it be possible,” he wonders, “that John didn’t accept my mediation?” There is always this chance. So, the next day he checks again, just to be sure ... And indeed, Johns networks has been extended, by -- one connection -- but more details show that this new contact is not the invitation from Eric.
“This is weird,” thinks Eric and he decides to give John a call. But at the same moment he understands that he has already lost an opportunity, because he should have called before. But ... as we all know, you are busy, and you fail to reserve the right amount of priority to this kind of issues ...
“Hi John,” - Amazing, Eric, that has been quite some while! I just saw an e-mail from you recently...
Both talk a bit, and John explains that he has sent an e-mail to Eric’s contact, requesting for some more information. “I wanted to challenge him a bit,” John said to Eric, "... what he wanted to achieve with this connection?"
“Yes,” Eric replies, “but this means that you have rejected me as a trusted source!” Would you have done the same when the president of your company would have passed a contact to you, the way I did?”
But the moment Eric is telling this, he knows that there is no point. In fact he realizes that he should have phoned John before sending him the link. That was the ultimate opportunity to get back in contact and to strengthen the relation. All else is second best...
Eric will know this for the next time. A missed opportunity.
© 2006 Hans Bool
Hans Bool is the founder of Astor White a traditional management consulting company that offers online management tools. Have a look at some of our free management tools
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